Over attached and Overinvested: the Self-Projection onto Celebrity Relationships

Fans meddling in their idols’ relationships crosses too many boundaries.


Photo Zoe Thaxton

Through the small lens that is social media, all relationships from celebrities and influencers appear perfect. It creates an unrealistic vision of their reality that fans grasp onto.

Zoe Thaxton, Online Managing Editor

With the rising age of social media, the status of one’s relationship tends to get plastered all over the internet. Pictures, videos, love messages, any form of love for everyone to see, not just the significant other. Its a sweet gesture that many couples participate in.

Of course, couples still include celebrities and their partners. Famous status doesn’t weed them out of the dating pool. They’re still people and participate in regular couple activities. They go on dates, kiss, post pictures, etc. However, their relationships tend to be more publicized for far more people to see than the average-joe.

It becomes practically impossible to hide a relationship from the public eye, the internet and fan-bases. From this rises an issue: a hyper-fixation on celebrities’ relationships.

“Omg! I love them!” “They’re so cute together!” “I can’t wait for them to get married!” “OTP!”

Innocent enough sentiments. A little invasive, but there’s no outright harm. Right?

There’s a fine line between complimenting a couple and becoming obsessive in the fandom-based internet. It becomes a blurry path. It’s perfectly normal to think a couple looks cute. It’s another to stalk them to the point of knowing everything about them. The internet had made knowing practically everything about a person acceptable. But, it becomes creepy. I’ve seen some fans try to compare a couple’s star signs to see if they’d be compatible, analyze an entire relationship from a few photos and information leaked by paparazzi or the celebrity themselves. It’s weird.

Fans become too attached to relationships because of what they see through the phone, like Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds joking tweets at each other. All everyone can see is this couple who cracks jokes about the other and a reciprocating something back.  That’s not reality!

And then… the breakups. Oh, the internet has complete meltdowns when this normal thing happens in some relationships. People can grow apart and fall out of love. It happens. Yet, these random strangers can be upset about it? It doesn’t make sense.

An extremely recent separation comes to mind when it came to public outrage: John Mulaney and his wife Anna Marie Tendler. The comedian preached about loving his wife in many of his standup performances mixed with hilarious stories. To see this “happy couple” divorce from what seemed out of nowhere sent fans into frenzy.

“How could he do this?” “Oh they were so happy!” They are grown adults, making decisions based on what’s best for themselves. No fan has insight on a marriage and absolutely no right to claim someone was happy.

Now, can I exclude myself from this mass group of fans? Of course not. Not completely. When Tom Holland and Zendaya officially announced they were dating and posted cute pictures of each other, I was extremely happy. Probably more so than I should’ve been. Their chemistry on screen bled into my sense of reality and a secret hope that a relationship would blossom. They were cute.

Though, I’ve never attacked someone because they broke up with my favorite celebrity or been upset the celebrity wasn’t single anymore. No. I know to be civil. I know that they’re people too. People who just want to have their own relationships like everyone else. I don’t let my vision of what I see on my phone get me upset.

Why do random people get a say in relationships in which they take no part in? They don’t and they shouldn’t. Love is between the couple, not some obsessive fans trying to peer and push their way in. Leave celebrities alone when it comes to their relationships.